As actor Shriya Pilgaonkar says in Bumble’s popular content series, Dating These Nights, “There’s save the dates and due dates but there’s also let’s go on a date?’” When you are dating in your 30s, you’re more aware of yourself, you have a higher degree of self-love, you’re more intentional about dating, and you’re quite clear about what you are looking for in a partner.
“There’s just something about your fourth decade that makes you feel way more grounded and secure in who you are. You also have life experiences under your belt now, which means you know more about what you do and don’t want in life and in a partner. Our recent research shows that people now want to date the way that works best for them, without compromises, and we want to encourage single Indians to date as their authentic self without inhibitions, on our app”, shares Samarpita Samaddar, India Communications Director, Bumble.
Shahzeen Shivdasani, relationship expert shares some tips to help navigate dating in your 30s
Age is just a number
Date at your own timeline and own terms. Don’t let societal pressure to get married by a certain age get to you. Finding the right partner or even getting married should have nothing to do with age. It should only be about you–whether you are ready for it and if you have met the person you want to take this step with.
Be yourself
Know who you are and clearly communicate what you want. Dating apps empower you to date more intentionally and communicate what matters the most to you. Don’t be afraid to be your authentic self as you put yourself out there.
Don’t hold back because of your past experiences
Our experiences may cause scars that we wear as a shield to protect us from not getting hurt again. When in fact it’s these experiences that teach us what we want and don’t want from a relationship. The key is to learn from your past and build on those learnings as you further explore dating. When getting to know someone, do not let past experiences interfere as you form a new bond.
Take your time and take the pressure off
When getting to know someone, take your time and decide if this is the person you really want to be with. Get to know them better and spend time with them, even if it is virtual. Love doesn’t have an expiry date, and let it happen when it’s meant to be. While you may really want to be in a relationship at this point in your life, it is important to ensure that it is the right one for you.
Respect boundaries
It’s extremely crucial to set boundaries when dating someone. Try to give them time and space instead of rushing into things. As much as relationships are about two people making a life together, healthy relationships are also the ones where you have an identity of your own.
Be kind
If something is not working out with the person that you are dating, remember to be kind–to them and to yourself. No one likes to be ghosted or treated like they don’t matter. All of us deserve the same respect that we would want to be given.
