Last Updated:
In the age of Instagram, we are not just scrolling through photos. We are scrolling through curated realities, airbrushed skin, sharpened jawlines, and eyes a few shades brighter than nature intended.
Instagram filters: Compliment generously, but wisely. Speak about dreams, not just dresses. Log off sometimes, and lean into the messy, magical reality of life. Because beyond the likes and lenses lies a version of you that is real, radiant, and already worthy.
Every day, as a dermatologist and life coach, I meet young people—especially Gen Z—grappling with something far more pervasive than acne or pigmentation. They are fighting a quieter, deeper battle: the war between their real selves and their filtered selves.
In the age of Instagram, we are not just scrolling through photos. We are scrolling through curated realities, airbrushed skin, sharpened jawlines, and eyes a few shades brighter than nature intended. Filters have gone from being fun photo tools to silent sculptors of self-worth. In addition, for an entire generation, this shift has been seismic. Dr. Aparna Santhanam, Dermatologist, Consultant & Transformational Life Coach shares all you need to know:
When the Mirror Doesn’t Match the Screen
One of the most heartbreaking things I’ve heard from a 19-year-old patient is this: “I feel pretty only when I use the Paris filter.” That sentence stayed with me.
Instagram filters, while seemingly harmless, often reinforce narrow beauty ideals—flawless skin, symmetrical features, a certain body type. What started as fun enhancements have now morphed into unattainable benchmarks. When young individuals—already at a tender, vulnerable stage of identity formation—consume a steady stream of these “perfect” faces and bodies, their own reflections begin to feel lacking.
This disconnect breeds not just dissatisfaction but shame. It erodes confidence, fosters body dysmorphia, and in extreme cases, drives people toward unnecessary cosmetic procedures or restrictive behaviors.
Who Gets to Decide What’s Beautiful?
It’s time we asked a critical question: Who defined these beauty standards? And why are we letting them govern how we feel about ourselves?
As someone who has worked with skin, hair, and the soul for over two decades, I’ve come to realize this: true beauty doesn’t lie in poreless skin or sculpted cheekbones. It lies in the courage to show up as you are—in all your authenticity.
From Filters to Foundations of Self-Worth
So how do we help this generation—smart, passionate, and perceptive—reclaim their self-worth?
1. Start Conversations Early
Create safe spaces where young people can express their insecurities without judgment. We need to normalize discussions about self-image and mental health as much as we do discussions about academics or careers.
2. Compliment Achievements, Not Just Appearances
When we praise someone, let it be for their resilience, creativity, kindness, or contribution—not just how they look. A young person who hears “You handled that project so well” will walk taller than one who hears only “You looked great in that post.”
3. Talk about Experiences, Not Just Beauty
Let’s shift our conversations toward meaningful experiences—what moved us, challenged us, or taught us something. When life becomes about growth, curiosity, and connection, appearances automatically lose their stranglehold on self-worth.
4. Teach Digital Literacy
Young people need to understand that social media is a highlight reel, not reality. The more we demystify what goes into creating that “perfect” image, the less power it holds.
5. Disconnect Digitally to Connect in Reality
Regular digital detoxes—whether it’s a few hours a day or a weekend offline—create space for real conversations, laughter, and human connection. It’s in those unfiltered, uncurated moments that self-worth truly begins to grow.
6. Balance Beauty with Being
As a dermatologist, I understand the joy of glowing skin or healthy hair. But as a life coach, I’ve seen that no aesthetic change can replace the power of inner peace. It’s not either-or. It’s about balance—caring for your outer self while deeply honoring your inner one.
7. Model Self-Acceptance
As adults, mentors, and caregivers, we must lead by example. Sharing our own vulnerabilities, doubts, and victories reminds younger generations that perfection is not the goal—authenticity is.
You Are More Than a Highlight Reel
To everyone reading this—especially the young woman wondering if she’s enough without a filter—let me remind you: You are not your likes, your angles, or your online persona. You are a full, evolving, beautifully imperfect human being.
Compliment generously, but wisely. Speak about dreams, not just dresses. Log off sometimes, and lean into the messy, magical reality of life. Because beyond the likes and lenses lies a version of you that is real, radiant, and already worthy.
